Thursday Reflections will be on hold during the Corona Virus Period which started on March 15, 2020.
Thursday Reflection
“If”
With the high level of anxiety that so many are experiencing, I offer the words of an inspirational poem penned so long ago. Many folks of my generation had to memorize it when we were in Junior High School. So, of course, know-it-all's like my 13 year old self never appreciated the timelessness of these words. Perhaps you might identify and/or take comfort from Kipling’s reflection on what today we would deem being an “adult” (man or woman) in an anxiety driven universe.
If
by Rudyard Kipling
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too:
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;
If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim,
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same:.
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build'em up with worn-out tools;
If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings,
And never breathe a word about your loss:
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings - nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much:
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!
Source: https://www.familyfriendpoems.com/poem/if-by-rudyard-kipling
Thursday Reflection
March 5, 2020
“You Can’t Handle the Truth!” – Jack Nicholson as Colonel Nathan Jessup in A Few Good Men
The Lord has this wonderful way to keep me humble, while at the same time, allowing me more insight into how I impact others. The other day, a person who must understand even less than I do about the use of social media (which I cannot believe is possible, but there you have it) unintentionally copied me on an email as she complained to other people how “annoyed” she was about something I had done. Now if you are afraid of being the recipient of such emails (even if inadvertently) then you need not apply to a life in ministry. You are always offending someone no matter how noble your intentions might have been. Sometimes this is a measure of how faithful you are being to the Gospel. Sometimes, not so much.
But these are often moments of grace. Not just because I have been given insight into how my actions were interpreted nor because this will allow me to always evaluate any question or compliment from this person with a mountain of salt (heck, I do that anyway!), but rather because it also allows me to have insight into myself, my motivations, my work ethic, my ability to tolerate differences and human frailty and of course my ability to forgive. When you get those rare moments of transparency from others, you should take time to see yourself as perceived by others. And this is a good thing. No always a happy thing, but it is a good thing.
In my years as the “parent” (hardly an “owner”) of an insightful border collie, the one thing Abby has constantly shown me is how I must not merely talk about caring for her whether it be day or evening, sunshine or torrential rain storm, summer breezes or winter blasts. Caring must take place. Even as her physical decline to cancer will eventually make that harder and emotionally draining, it must be done. Talk is cheap (as they say) and utterly useless by itself.
Making changes in oneself, becoming a more understanding person, acknowledging one’s own faults when necessary or standing by unpopular but right decisions no matter what others think of you – these are not words of a Lenten sermon. They are not just talk. Talk is cheap and utterly useless by itself – if I may be so bold as to quote myself. Using the time of this season for self-reflection and growth – to live into the truth: that is what Christ has called you to be. How would you handle the truth if someone accidentally let you see yourself not as you think or even know you are, but as others see you? How would you handle the truth of realizing how God sees you? What would you do? Talk is cheap and utterly useless by itself. But you already know that.
-- Fr. Joe
Thursday Reflection
How about a few theological questions for you to ponder as the church community begins to once again walk into that spiritual wilderness known as Lent.
Do I ever take the time to reflect on why I am here and what God’s purpose for me has been or continues to be?
Perhaps the same question seen from a different angle: whose lives have been bettered because I have been a part of them?
If Lent is merely a time to “give up chocolate,” why am I wasting my time (and the Lord’s time) pretending the season has any meaning?
Like it or not, as an adult, I am a role model. As an adult Christian, I am supposed to model Christ. So what kind of Christ do others see when they watch me?
Is it easier to love your pet than to love other human beings, and if so, what does that say about your understanding of love?
Do I really believe in a Jesus who died to redeem even the one person in my life whom I can’t stand?
If I find that I am consistently being taken for granted, how do I react? What needs to change?
To quote the Lord: “if you love those who love you, what merit is there in that? Even the pagans do that!”
When was the last time I was actually and sincerely grateful to anyone working with me or for me?
If there is garbage in my life that keeps me from being happy and keeps me from being at peace with God, then when am I ever going to take out the garbage?
Happy Lent !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-- Fr. Joe
Thursday Reflection
I Think the Whole Country Could Use a Good Dose of a Holy Lent
In seven days, we Christians, no matter our denomination or tradition - except for Eastern Rite Christians who are a week behind us, liturgically speaking but that’s another story – will enter into the more somber and solemn season of Lent. During this forty day (more or less) period, we are all going to have the opportunity to take a “time out” and reflect (like Christians of a long forgotten era who had been undergoing periods of public penance) on how we having been living up to and in to our Baptism covenant. Are we thinking, feeling and acting as disciples of the Risen One who has called us into His life? Are we taking our own mortality and finiteness seriously as we take time out and listen to a call to once again “repent and believe in the Good News” of our redemption in Christ.
So far, this sounds like an Ash Wednesday sermon, doesn’t it? But I’d like to make this more graphic. Last Sunday, there is this wonderfully terse statement from Jesus about the meaning of YOUR words. “Say “yes’ when you mean ‘yes’ and ‘no’ when you mean ‘no’. Everything else comes from the Evil One.”
Haven’t we all just had enough of all the language fudging? Using sports as a microcosm for general culture, haven’t we heard enough about players who cheat, get caught and then demand that we look the other way. No one cheats: they are “getting an edge”. No one must be held accountable: they are too important a product making money for the owners and therefore must be protected from their responsibility. (Do any of you remember: “too big to fail” as a reason why banks had to be protected from their outrageous practices that brought the housing market down over a decade ago?)
No one lies: they “misspeak” or “misremember” or “speak prematurely or have their spokesperson pump out explanations as to why you are at fault for challenging their (mis)statements. We now have “alternate truths,” “Spinning” used to be a child’s game or the frightful result of a car on ice. Now it is a way to manufacture “your narrative” as opposed to objective truth – which doesn’t exist anyway as we are told.
And the guardians of truth are hardly better. It seems that it is far more important to get the story “first” rather than get it ‘right”. A false account can get large type on page 1. A retraction and admission of inaccuracy will be buried on the lower left corner on p. 47 of section c-67.
Jesus taught that saying anything simply beyond the simple truths of “yes” and “no” is a product of the Evil One. Seems like a lot of Evil One stuff is going on. Seems to me like we as a nation really need to do some “repenting and believing” this Lent.
-- Fr. Joe
Thursday Reflection
I Really Do Not Deal With Change Very Well!
There was a time when I used to (secretly) make fun of my first pastor (and mentor) because I saw him as a person who struggled to deal with change in his life. I was the young assistant pastor, newly ordained, fresh from study, stocked full of new ideas and all chock full of ministerial fervor mixed in with an unhealthy dollop of self-aggrandizement. See things with my eyes! I speak for a new generation. My theories will prove more important that your facts or experience. While my place in time prevented me from being a “millennial,” I certainly had my share of a twenty-something’s infallibility.
Funny how life’s journey has now placed me in the role of my mentor. I am hearing new voices uttering untested thoughts and theories even as I hear others holding on to the worldview and world they knew but which may no longer exist. How willing am I to listen to the voices of younger questioning voices? How many of my own presumptions am I willing to give up?
The parish had such an experience a year ago when it undertook the removal of buried oil tanks on the property? What if “back in the day” decades and decades ago there had been any voices warning that burying steel containers (which some day may leak or break apart) filled with an ultimately toxic substance such as heating oil just might not be the best idea. This is not just a parish matter but a planetary concern.
I try so hard to not regurgitate all of my dad’s verbiage – you know, ye olde “when I was a kid…” – but I am living, yet again, in what is supposed to be a winter season in the northeast, knowing that when I was a kid the winters were certainly colder and snowier. No, I didn’t walk to school in snowstorms uphill both ways, but I can easily recall far more single digit temperature days and snowy treks to class (city kids almost never have a “snow day” off in elementary or high school) and having the opportunity to make some money shoveling “old people’s sidewalks.” Something is certainly different and strange going on, and I’d be a fool to shut my ears to those who ask us to take notice.
There was a time when stores gave out plastic bags so that we used fewer paper bags and ultimately fewer trees. Now plastic is bad and paper is good (if you pay for it) but in the end, how are we going to deal with the overcrowding of our landfills? Take a side trip to Utrecht in the Netherlands, and a block from the train station there is a huge plastic “whale like creature” that has been constructed from the plastic bottles and other containers that have washed into Dutch canals and dykes from the Atlantic Ocean and the North Sea. (This is not the ranting of an eco-terrorist. I saw this “art” disaster sculpture for myself last summer when I arrived in Utrecht.) I know we need to change our thinking and use of plastic, but am I really willing to listen and then change.
I was once a voice insisting upon change. Now I am part of a generation that often does not want to hear others insist upon the same thing. I hope I have not forgotten that this is really not merely an environmental issue or a political issue but a theological issue. Holy Scripture teaches that we have been created in the Divine image. We have been given a caretaker role – to be stewards of “this fragile earth, our island home.” (Eucharistic Prayer C) I often think I hear the words of my Savior telling me: “true, if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it, but if it is broke , then what are you going to do about it? That’s why I put you here!” Are you listening?
-- Fr. Joe
Thursday Reflection
It’s all about ME! - seriously?
I’m sitting at my desk with sports talk radio droning on in the background. The church office is empty now, and I’m taking a break from working on a report that is due in Diocesan Office on March 1. Usually radio noise is just that: noise in the background. But I found today’s rant between hosts fascinating. It seems that an ultra-star uber-rich quarterback who plays for an unnamed New England football team has put out some controversial photo of himself leading to speculation as to whether he will remain at his not-to-be-named team or is moving on.
What’s fascinating to the program hosts is discovering what appears to be a shameless attempt on the part of this special athletic somebody - who is always the center of attention at Super Bowl time because his team, more often than not, plays in this game and he is used to being the center of attention - desperately trying to take the conversation away from the actual participants of the game. In fact, for whatever reason, he has even taken conversations away from the tragic death of a former star in another sport. The airways are now filled with defending the “new normal” – it’s all about ME, and it is intolerable that you think of anyone other than ME.
I’m not smirking. I’ve seen such attitudes play out in a variety of places – including ecclesiastical settings. I’ve seen scholars exude charm and tact and a willingness to enlighten others so long as those others defer to them and them alone. In the course of decades in both parish and diocesan settings, I have received the “don’t you know who I am?” treatment. It is said – and I don’t know whether this is true or a gross exaggeration and stereotype – that millennials live by this creed. It’s all about me!
I do know that I have encountered more than my share of not-very-bright drivers on Rt. 35 who cannot tolerate my already doing 50 in a 45 m.p.h. zone, and who race past in spite of double line and blocked vision from curves. They are too important to be held to the same standards as you or I.
I keep hearing the need for “conversation” and “communication” as struggle with our changing mores on issues of race, gender, language, homelessness, fiscal fairness or any other topic. But I wonder: if the focus is only on ME, then how seriously is this quest for actual dialogue. If it’s only all about me, then why should I ever care what you or anyone else thinks? And by their behaviors, so many demonstrate that they really do not.
Entitlement, self-absorption, being completely unaware of how one’s attitudes are perceived by others – all these dangerous traits seem to infect too many personalities, political positions, and even interpretations about what it means to be “church”. Is it about the mission of Jesus and the place to which we have been called? Is it about service, caring and the search for truth, or is it about how I feel, how important I am, how I need to get my way all the time. Is it about love or is it about me? In the so called sports world, self-aggrandizement may have become our new normal. But has this become a description of our “real” lives as well?
-- Fr. Joe
Thursday Reflection
I’m Learning to Stop “Judging” Our Young.
Even though I have repeated this maxim to more than a few parents, I am only now – so many decades into my own life’s story – learning to refrain from making final assessments or judgments about young people (be they grand children or parishioner’s children). Who we are now may not be what we will become, then. Conversely my likes, dislikes and passions as a teen only cause me sighs and smiles as I type these words today.
As a kid I hated to write, hated being immersed in English studies, and was basically judged as a mediocre student, at best, when demonstrating writing skills. All that is true. And I would have laughed at you if you would have predicted over 50 years ago that I would be writing this weekly reflection and enjoying this opportunity to reflect with you all.
I abhorred the study of languages other than English – living or dead languages – as a child or as a teen, so of course God with God’s infinite sense of humor directs me to study for ordained ministry where I would have to be proficient in both classical Latin and Koine Greek, as well as be capable of comprehending four years of theological/biblical lectures in Italian.
I dreaded public speaking and had a professor of speech once tell me in college to find a new day job because my ability to communicate was below average at best. So of course I entered a profession where I must speak publicly and weekly – and have done so for almost 45 years.
When my parents received an English Sheep Dog puppy to abide with and create chaos for them in their five room apartment in New Rochelle, I swore I would never ever allow myself to become attached to any dog who would invade (and control) my space – and then Abby came into my life!
The point of this reflection is simple and perhaps simplistic. It’s just a reminder that the children we love today – who at times also exasperate and frustrate us – are totally unfinished products. What their abilities, likes, skills, dislikes will be as adults, may or may not be manifest to your eyes this day. The daughter who drives you to distraction may one day shock you with her accomplishments and make you cry with pride at her abilities. The son you deem so perfect today may grow to only break your heart.
What we, the elders, see in our young may or may not be what God intends for them or what their abilities (or lack thereof) will create for them. All we can and should do is love them, pray for them, encourage them, pick them up when they fall, display “tough love” when necessary, and be open to be told, years from now that, yes: we were right and they were not, OR (horror of horrors) they were always right about themselves and we misread them as the persons into which they were developing.
In any event, don’t judge them by what they are today. Their final stories (and skills, and loves and losses) are a long way from being discovered by them or by us. Only the Lord has seen the finished story.
Fr. Joe
Thursday Reflection
So what is it about “the truth?”
I prayed for a break in the impeachment talking heads-a-thon, and my prayers were answered: media domination of a baseball cheating scandal. It’s highly developed, technologically creative and as old as the game itself. To hear the powers-that-be, and media guru’s all react with horror brings the same smile I always display when, watching Casablanca, I watch the Claude Raines’ character (Capt. Louis Renault) tell Bogart “I am shocked” to hear that illegal activities might be going on at Rick’s Café. There’s this ongoing truth and understanding but no one wants to deal with it.
So late Saturday I got to thinking. What is it about “the truth?” We demand it, but often really don’t want to know it. I was walking in the snow with Abby who was zooming about in the snowfall like a puppy as she always does, except now, without knowing the truth, her body is betraying her, and a blood disease will be laying claim to her. But she only feels joy for snow. Is she better off not knowing the truth?
We’re watching a political drama unfold on TV – knowing the truth – that barring the second coming of Our Lord, just as the votes in the House were predetermined by party affiliation, so also will be the votes in the Senate. Why not just have everyone just show up one afternoon, take attendance (thereby knowing the vote total anyway) and go out for a drink. Everything else is for show. That’s the truth. Are we better off pretending there is another truth?
Jack Nicholson shouted at Tom Cruise in A Few Good Men that now classic line: “You can’t handle the truth!” Let me wonder out loud a bit more: Ours has become and increases to deteriorate into a society and culture that has less room for God and more room for hate. Crimes “inspired” by racial and religious hatred are rising. People’s commitment to and affiliation with religious traditions continue to shrink. You think there might be a relationship among those facts! Or is that just another truth with which we don’t need to bother ourselves.
We text more but speak to one another less. Social Media, and those who rule it, can be harsh, unfair, cruel, and filled with falsehoods – even false identities of those allegedly giving their opinions and sharing their “outrages” all the time. Is “social” media really a springboard for ANTI-SOCIAL attitudes and behaviors? Is that a truth we don’t want to deal with?
I wonder whether Jesus would use the phrase that “.I am the Truth..” if He lived among us these days? What is it about “truth” that makes us just so uncomfortable to deal with it? What is that truth or those truths that God is calling me to acknowledge about myself or my community?
Or has it always been about avoiding truth when inconvenient? Is that the ultimate truth of our culture?
Fr. Joe
Thursday Reflection
Found This on line and it got me to thinking theologically
Fr. Joe
All Dressed Up
Daily Devotional
By Elizabeth Baumann
My two little girls love the Fancy Nancy books by Jane O’Connor. Nancy is a little girl who loves everything to be fancy—she laces her vocabulary with French, wears frills on her socks, decks her bedroom in ruffles and Christmas lights, and always has sprinkles on her ice cream. Her family, including her little sister, are not fancy. Her stories unfold as conflict ensues from Nancy’s trying to make her family fancier.
At the risk of jettisoning modesty and meekness, I think of Nancy when I read the line in today’s lesson: “clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience.” Nancy knows no limits when she gets dressed. Even her curly hair erupts with decorations. She stands out of most of the books’ illustrations as an outrageous concoction of color amid an otherwise ordinary scene. Likewise, the virtues are not bland, they may well make us look ridiculous in the eyes of the world, they may spark conflict with others’ values—and there is no such thing as taking them too far!
Like Nancy, my own girls love dressing up. Children know the power of clothes to help us know who we are and imagine who we want to be. I don’t think Paul made a mistake when he chose the seemingly mundane verb “clothe.” Virtues don’t come from within us. We take them as whole garments from Jesus himself and we learn to put them on, making us who we are, fitting us for the things we will do. If you’re going to do a fancy thing—like be holy—or go to a fancy place—like Heaven—first you put on your fancy clothes. And if my children show me anything, it’s that when dressing up there is only one rule: “The more, the better.”
Ms Baumann bio (which I suspect is a bit tongue-in-cheek) appears below:
Elizabeth Baumann is a seminary graduate, a priest’s wife, and the mother of two small daughters. A transplant from the West Coast, she now lives in “the middle of nowhere” in the Midwest with too many cats.
Thursday Reflection
Do you believe in making New Year’s Resolutions?
Do you believe in making New Year’s Resolutions? I mean, for the most part, we humans fall into “same-old, same old.” Of course I should resolve to exercise more especially since I am well into being a “senior citizen” now, I should eat healthier – O yes, I do eat fruits and veggies, but there are those moments when my lust for a truck filled with BBQ ribs more than equals the hormone induced reactions that my body had to various female rock stars in my teen years. (and who they are/ were are NONE of your business!)
I could promise that this year I intend to spend more down time with Abby as we try to make her now cancer filled journey last as long as possible but without unnecessary pain or chemicals that would steal from her the enthusiasm and joy that comes from being a dog. And indeed I will.
I might promise to try to be more patient – and this is proving to be a real challenge. I can now begin to understand why my dad (cranky at the best of times) was so pushed to the limits by human stupidity. (So if I fail, be prepared, in the best Clint Eastwood tradition, to hear me yell at you: “get off my lawn!!!” (cf. film: "Gran Torino")
Associated with the above, I can now become more forgiving of dad since I see myself becoming my father’s son at this same time in life.
This may sound silly, but I may promise to stop reading all papers, books and texts as if I were preparing for some exam. I read everything with a yellow under liner – which drives my significant other crazy. Now is the time to begin to just read for learning or read for enjoyment but just read!
Perhaps I might try to spend more time with family – especially my extended family – since we know not how much time any of us will have. Or maybe and finally, I shall promise to take a breath, worry less about how I feel or how busy I am or am not, and just enjoy my time with whomever is present, and view that the person to whom I am speaking is, for me at this moment, a person God has put into my life. Listen to him/her. Be loving and understanding and make this year a time for increase in faith, hope and especially love.
Fr. Joe
Thursday Reflection
Letting Song speak to us between now and Christmas
Between now and the end of the year, I want to let the words of sacred music capture the spirit of these weeks and offer food for your souls.
So as we approach Advent IV and its emphasis on the faith and importance of Mary of Nazareth – mother of Jesus – Mother of God, pray these words:
Mary did you know that your baby boy would one day walk on water?
Mary did you know that your baby boy would save our sons and daughters?
Did you know that your baby boy has come to make you new?
This child that you've delivered, will soon deliver you
Mary did you know that your baby boy will give sight to a blind man?
Mary did you know that your baby boy will calm a storm with his hand?
Did you know that your baby boy has walked where angels trod?
When you kiss your little baby, you kiss the face of God
Mary did you know? Mary did you know? Mary did you know?
Mary did you know? Mary did you know? Mary did you know?
The blind will see, the deaf will hear, the dead will live again
The lame will leap, the dumb will speak, the praises of the lamb
Mary did you know that your baby boy is Lord of all creation?
Mary did you know that your baby boy would one day rule the nations?
Did you know that your baby boy is heaven's perfect lamb?
That sleeping child you're holding is the great I am
Mary did you know? Mary did you know? Mary did you know?
Mary did you know? Mary did you know? Mary did you know? Oh
Mary did you know?
Listen to it performed: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ifCWN5pJGIE
Fr. Joe
Thursday Reflection
So what would it take to make you happy?
Heard an outrageous telephone conversation on the radio last week! In the la la- land of “sports talk radio,” this is the time of the year when extremely talented already rich baseball players are courted by extremely rich baseball teams (of which, sadly, the team I support is NOT ), and these “free agent” players are offered obscene amounts of money over a span of years that (in the real world) could infuse the economies of several countries.
So I am working on a sermon but, in the background, am listening to a caller who (I thought quite reasonably) had proposed that a certain pitcher whom the rich spoiled New York team was trying to sign might be offered a contract of $50,000,000.00 per year for three (3) years. Can we agree that $150 million dollars (total) is nothing to sneeze at? The already rich player gets more money than he could spend in his lifetime. The even richer owner doesn’t have to worry about a long term contract of 7 – 10 years when there is a likelihood that the player might be injured or his skills would diminish with age. It’s a win/ win – right?
Silly me. The caller was mocked by the host. No player “would be happy” with that kind of contract. Nor would the players union “be happy” if he accepted such a contract. I won’t get into the reasons – they would only make you as angry as I am.
But as this is a time of the year when we often wish one another the JOY of this season – even to unbelievers I extend a Merry Christmas and the peace that Christ truly brings as I actually do wish this for them even if they do not understand, appreciate or feel they need it. I truly pray for folks to be happy in their lives. In a world filled with anger, terrorism, political machinations, road rage, violence, unfulfilling jobs, strained relationships with family members or work associates or lack friends – heck the list can go on and on - can’t we find any way to be happy?
At first I was outraged at the reasoning why any person (even a very talented athlete) could not be happy being compensated with $150 million dollars. But for some, no amount of money will ever be enough. And, in my years of speaking with folks in the stores, on the streets, in the office and even pastoral counseling, if I am being completely honest, some of us are just never happy, never pleased, never generous, never kind, never see the good in others and always ready to criticize. It’s so easy to mock the ball player, but sadly he is only a symptom of the self-absorption of our time. In a world when you can offend anyone at any moment by anything you might think or say, there is little hope for us to be at peace with each other. And if it is true (and it is): “no justice, no peace,” then it is also true: “no peace, no happiness.”
If my horizon is marked only by what I “need” (often mistaking “want” for true “need”), then again my life is going to be dark and joyless because no amount of money, adulation, work, degrees, or significant others will ever make me truly happy.
Francis of Assisi taught that it is “in giving that we receive.” Funny! Giving does tend to make me receive – joy! In spite of what I give, I always end up receiving even more! I wonder if this would work for anyone else. I wonder if we’d all be happier if we extended ourselves more for others.
Ironic isn’t it. Secular culture demands the removal of God from the public sphere. And the more we do this, the less happy, as a culture, we seem to be.
Fr. Joe
Thursday Reflection
“Let me give you the bad news and then some good news”
That was the way the phone conversation began on the Tuesday before Thanksgiving – a call for which we were waiting from the vet went something like this: “Abby has T- Cell Lymphoma. Yes it is serious, but it is not Leukemia, and its effects will not be immediate. It is cancer but not an aggressive cancer. Her white cell count is not yet even at 1/ 3 of that number where chemo is going to have to be considered.” All things being equal, she may be with us for a couple of years more.
Of course such news brings sadness. All the stages of grief come into play be they for a family member, a friend or even a quirky beloved border collie. So Abby, a theologian at heart, and I had one of “those conversations” since she knew that our relationship is now changing. She reminded me to stop feeling sadness. Life is always too short, and sadness, while completely natural and honest, often makes us incapable of appreciating a deeper reality that needs to be recognized and preached. And most of all, it prevents us from experiencing the joys that are still so very real.
Abby reminded me that a few years ago, I had had a serious sit down talk with one of the kids in the Confirmation Class. She had lost a beloved pet, but now was being told at school that since only humans have an immortal soul, once a pet dies, it ceases to exist. “Once you’re dead, you’re dead” goes the saying. I told her that some Christian Churches do teach this. But touching upon my own reading of Holy Scripture, I also know from First Letter of St. John that “God is love, and he (obviously also she) who abides in love, abides in God, and God in (them).” I remember telling her that our pets are given to us to take care of and to enjoy. They give love and receive love. They abide in love – and so, taking my bible to heart, I know they abide in God. And they will do so after they die. So, Abby barked, remember what you once told this young parishioner, and now you live into that truth. Believe in life eternal – including my life.
Abby jogged my memory as she reinforced things I already knew: that it is the humans who commit crimes, hurt each other and are capable of moral evil. Humans sin, not animals! Our pets do not create weapons of mass destruction, commit random acts of terrorism, despoil our environment, cheat, embezzle, ignore the cry of the poor or homeless, abuse women and children, or pretend to be what they are not. Our pets simply give love and hopefully receive love. Yes they can be willful, stubborn, and even disobedient. But that can be for our benefit as well. After all, who can stand living with anyone (on two or four legs) who thinks he or she is perfect?
There was a reason, Abby commented, why St. Francis of Assisi preached to the birds and animals. (She clearly does not think that this is only a pious legend but actually did happen). Whereas people can turn off the message of goodness, animals do not. Be worthy of the message. Our pets are. We – not always.
So yes, while I know that cancer is not going to return Abby’s body to “dust and ashes” in the near future –still a premature passing is waiting for her (and all of us if I am honest) much sooner than we would like. So I listen to my theologically gifted pet: don’t put off spending time to be with those you love. Appreciate friendships. Live as a child of God. Be enthusiastic. Be kind to those who need kindness, and not merely to those who deserve it. Bark if you have to. And know that when life’s journey comes to an end, even if “too soon” as it apparently will be the case for Abby, our loving God waits for us all in our true and lasting home – if only we would live our lives in God’s love. So make use of the time you’ve been given and, as St. Paul wrote (and Abby learned) “walk in love, as Christ loved us.”
Fr. Joe
A Thanksgiving Prayer
Thanksgiving Day
Almighty and gracious Father, we give you thanks for the fruits of the earth in their season and for the labors of those who harvest them. Make us, we pray, faithful stewards of your great bounty, for the provision of our necessities and the relief of all who are in need, to the glory of your Name; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever. Amen.
Thursday Reflection
So For What Will We Be Thankful?
Truthfully, this year is going to test my flimsy grasp onto hope and optimism as I reflect on 2019 and consider all those things for which I should offer thanks.
Trolling the news hasn’t uplifted my spirits! We remain a country severely divided on so many issues of race, gender, political philosophy, definition of “high crime and misdemeanors,” gun control, violence, sanctity of life, school shootings, or even if there is any need for a place for religion in our scientifically enlightened culture.
I have watched old friends move away this year to enter a new and final chapter in their lives known as “retirement.” I am also quite aware that a chapter by that very name is not that far beyond my own experiential horizon.
Do I offer thanks for my clearly aging body and mind that remind me on a daily basis that I no longer possess skills I had long assumed would always be mine?
On the church front, so many dedicated members of established religious traditions (both clergy and lay members) live with delusion that good old days, large numbers and growth are just around the corner. We just need to have the proper magical formula work again – whatever that magical formula flavor of the month is!
And yet, next Thursday I will be ever so thankful to our God and Father. In spite of “clear and present danger” that the “thought police”, the “culture police”, the “dress police”, or the “food police” (among others) now dictate what is proper behavior (silly me – I always thought 10 commandments kind of said it all – didn’t need to go back to a list of 613!) I am grateful I live as a person who can think and speak and worship and write and relax as I choose.
I am grateful that while my health is experiencing the natural decline that must surely come (how damming to hear your doctor tell you that you are very fit “for someone as old as you” – Thanks), I am grateful for the health I have.
I am grateful for having been blessed with a loving companion for all these years, and perhaps someday I will write down (to be read after I am gone) all the nastiness and opposition two not-so-young persons experienced from both ecclesiastical and family sources who opposed that friendship and love. And you will know of the power of unselfish love that I have experienced.
I am grateful for every teen that has crossed my path in the various manifestations of youth ministry over the decades – not just because I have survived their rolling eyes, hateful stares, fuming exasperation, but also their concerns, their dreams, their fears, their understanding of God in their lives and even at times their secrets – simply because someone needed a judgement free zone in which to speak.
Of course I am grateful for a throw-away piece of garbage Border Collie which, as a puppy, was tossed to the streets, survived residence in a southern kill shelter, and made her way into New York and into my life. I am grateful for all the challenges and love experienced from her over the years. I am even grateful that some of you actually believe she really does talk to me.
I am grateful for the time I have been given. I hope there will be more, but if that is not to be, then let my final breaths be that of gratitude and not grumbling. I pray you all have a Happy Thanksgiving, and that you recognize all for which you ought to be grateful in spite of the darkness of our times.
Fr. Joe
Thursday Reflection
Now You Can Stand Up and NOT Be Seen!
Last week I began the day listening to a grumbling Abby – “So what’s wrong with you?” (She barked) “Aren’t you disturbed by all the Christmas music, Christmas movies, Christmas ads and sales and specials, and Black Fridays etc etc? We’re hardly past Halloween and not even near Thanksgiving yet.” And Abby can be a loud insistent and at times utterly annoying border collie whose observations of the American scene can be both humorous and troublesome.
The day continued. I went down to our Diocesan Convention and caught up, in between sessions, talking with old friends, classmates, some former students and parishioners from all over this Episcopal Diocese of New York. And I listened to so much complaining: “Aren’t you disturbed by all the Christmas music, Christmas movies, Christmas ads and sales and specials, and Black Fridays etc etc? We’re hardly past Halloween and not even near Thanksgiving yet.” They didn’t bark. They just grumbled.
Maybe it’s me, but I often see things from a different perspective. Young (and now, often, not-so-young) adults who walk into a church hoping to have their child baptized or wanting to be married but who have had no connection to any church in years, if ever, are not to me, objects of contempt but rather souls to be won for Christ. To be welcomed home with love and respect and seen as the future of the Christian community, not to be ridiculed for their past.
So I am grateful for this now this seemingly almost complete victory of the forces of secularization in capturing the so called holiday (not Christmas) climate. And “why?” you might ask. Because this now gives us time to use and choices to make. I can purposely NOT participate in this shopping rushing about “holiday” madness and share with anyone (or no one) who listens why I choose to be different. You can bow and worship before the altar of Black Fridays and overindulgent parties. If that really makes you happy (and I am still searching for evidence of this), then good luck to you. Eat and drink to excess. Deal with church stuff only when you want “warm fuzziness.”
But that doesn’t work and it’s not real. Now I see our time, like the Christians of an era when such an identification led to not only scorn but possible arrest and execution, to stand up and stand apart. I choose to make the season of Advent (in terms of my reflections, my readings, and my personal prayer) a time of preparation and longing for what (and WHO) is truly important. I am not going to succumb to the enticements of so called “instant gratification.” I am going wish folks “the peace of God that passes all understanding” and not waste my time with the culture war of “Merry Christmas” vs. “Happy Holidays.” Let those who have taken the religious dimension from this season think they have won. I will witness and testify to the opposite and let the “evil of the present age” simply know what I stand for. No Abby, I am not grumbling at the season. I am just rolling up my symbolic sleeves and getting to work for Christ.
Fr. Joe
Thursday Reflection
“No more war. War never again” (Pope Paul VI – 1964)
Every year, November 11 comes along with its unexpected day off from work (for some of us) and a special holiday sale (for those who shop) – and sadly the memory of the meaning of the day has all but slipped into history’s dustbin. There are no more survivors of “the great war’ among us any longer. There are no voices to retell the stories of the horrors that the 20thcentury’s first use of weapons of mass destruction. Only the “who-cares” history textbooks try to capture the mood of a world that was so bored that it felt it needed a good war to stir things any excuse would do: if not for the murder of one of those European royalty types, there would have been some other excuse. And we got to try out all news methods of killing: mustard gas, trench warfare, aerial bombing and strafing, the “dogfights” between opposing airmen and the finest use of 19th century thinking and planning sending young men into the teeth of 20th century technology.
It was the war to end all wars – except it wasn’t. And the killing continues in wars official and unofficial, declared or not. And now we must add to the mix the actions of terrorists (foreign and domestic) who kill for ideology rather than territory or national identity.
The point is that on the 11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month of 1918, that portion of humanity had declared that it had had enough of a bloodlust. Voices cried and (and documents were signed) that had said “enough.”
And yet war continues. I was a high school sophomore sitting on one of those monuments that used to be in center field at Yankee Stadium where I and (it seemed like) a zillion other high school students listened to a Pope who traveled to the U.N. and then celebrated an open air mass for peace (unheard of in that day) call for peace. That was 1964. How many wars since?
As a Christian and a priest – I try to live the words of Francis of Assisi: “Lord make me an instrument of your peace.” When I was 15, I thought I would change the world. Today I know I did not and cannot. But I will be an instrument of peace on whatever tiny little portion of this planet I reside for as many days as my Creator has determined I am to remain here. Armistice Day (as Nov. 11 was originally called) taught me that nations and governments and systems and philosophies or even church structures do not create peace. Only God does. And only when I listen. And only when I choose to live as a man of peace.
Fr. Joe
Thursday Reflection
It’s about time!
Can you believe it is “All Hallows Eve” or slurred into one single word: “Halloween.” Tonight many, little ones (or those choosing to be little) will playfully or seriously deal with “…the ghoulies and ghosties and long-leggedy beasties and things that go bump in the night…”
For me, this night marks the end of summer and easy-autumn. Now I start thinking about all the “stuff” that happens between this moment and the end of the year: Thanksgiving, traveling, and Christmas shopping and pageants and concerts and gatherings and liturgies, and yeah, planning parish budget and the parish annual meeting that occurs 35 days after Christmas, and the parochial report due 66 days after Christmas.
So much will happen so rapidly. And off we shall run and force ourselves to enjoy ourselves when some are wistful and sad, others are harried and frenzied. Some take offense at any religious significance to a religious feast, and others retaliate and wish only evil on those who share not their own view of the meaning of the days.
We’ll talk and we’ll race about and we’ll dine – at least some of us will. Others living in the shadows will watch from afar. With all this rushing, I force myself to remember that Jesus not only redeemed persons – our “souls” to use the vocabulary of perennial theology – but he also redeemed time! If it is true that all of existence was caught up in the redemptive self-gift of Christ, then that includes “time” itself. So this means I need to be thinking about “time.” How do I use it? How do I abuse it? How am I its prisoner? Does it allow me to enjoy my life or am I forever hastening to the next stop, the next thing, the next meeting, the next meal, and over and over and over because I have not mastered time.
I don’t know all (maybe not any) of the answers. But I know this: we don’t need to create “ghoulies and ghosties And long-leggedy beasties” to frighten us. We make time itself the demon that terrifies us.
Fr. Joe
Thursday Reflection
So why are we doing this again?
It’s early Sunday morning, and I’m sitting in the church office knowing that the first persons who will arrive for the morning service will not be here for at least ninety minutes. It’s going to be a long day because later on, I plan to walk in the Crop Walk to help raise awareness to fight hunger. Abby is going to walk with me to make sure her out-of-shape old two legged caretaker will complete his commitment. And border collies have a way to herding you to spaces and places you might not wish to go.
Each year we have the same conversation. Although she loves to walk and run, she keeps telling me that she doesn’t understand why we need to be doing this. Nor can she comprehend why I must in conscience contribute to Bread for the World, Food for the Poor, or any of the local food pantries. Don’t we have the technology to end food shortages? Is this not most blessed, productive, and generous nation filled with not just the cruel and cantankerous (as portrayed in so often media) but also with open hearted and generous people? We humans should be capable of anything, right? Heck in an era when computers were glitz and trash (by contemporary standards), didn’t we rebuild both Lee Majors and Lindsey Wagner into bionic crime fighting spy thwarting superheroes for a mere $6,000,000 apiece – hardly more than the salary of the 24th bench warming player on the roster of a major league baseball team these days.
Here’s what I tell her each year. It’s not about technology or finances. It is about heart and soul. It is about inspired- from-beyond-ourselves desire to say ENOUGH to the injustices in which the have-nots of this and every society are drenched. It’s the recognition that spirituality without religion while allegedly fashionable is a bumper sticker slogan that has continued to produce narcissistic entitled folks who simply do not see the pain of others, or if they do, they hardly care. Like it or not, it is only when one recognizes the ONE who is greater than me and who commands me to love my brothers and sisters and do good for them not so that I feel good but rather because God’s world is to be marked by justice for all – no matter what culture one lives in, what nation one is a citizen of, how you vote, how you dress, or what religion (or lack thereof) you might profess. If you don’t care enough about more than yourself, then nothing ever changes. Status quo rules. Power will continue to corrupt. Children will continue to go hungry.
But later today we will continue to walk and give witness and hopefully raise money to try to make a small difference. And Abby can continue to inform her canine compatriots – And maybe she will finally understand. And maybe they will listen! And maybe some day we also will.
Fr. Joe